Posts Tagged ‘Family’
Blog Talk Radio – Family Life Behind Bars
There is a new radio show on Blog Talk Radio that talks each week about being a family member of someone behind bars. The show gives a fresh perspective to this topic and hosts some interesting guests each week. Listen to their introductory show here.
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Listen to their guest Caitlin Dunklee talk about the “Drop the Rock” campaign to reverse the Rockefeller Drug Laws in New York.
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Posted by hcdmedia
My First Memory of My Father – a Prison Visit
The first memory of my father was when my grandmother, uncles, and I went to visit him in Angola. It was my very first visit.
We sat at a table in the lunch room/ visiting room and he drank Root Beer pop, that was his favorite at the time. We talked and talked and talked. He taught me how to spell lots of big words. That has never left my mind. I can still picture that moment.
I knew that my father was in prison, ever since I was about 1 or 2 years old. My grandmother and mother always said that I was a very smart little girl. They were very informative about his situation. He would call me ALL THE TIME.
What it meant for me was that I would not be able to grow up with him in the house, go to the store together, pick me up from school, help me with homework, read to me at night , and meet my first boyfriend, etc., etc. I especially could not call him whenever I wanted to talk to him.
Visiting days were the best! I always got extremely sad when it was time to leave, but the relief of being able to give my father a big hug was always comforting on the ride home.
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Bwashena Witherspoon is the daughter of Ashanti Witherspoon who is featured in the documentaries THE FARM and THE FARM: 10 DOWN. Bwashena has spent time touring with her father and speaking about being the child of a former prisoner.
Posted by Bwashena
Prison Pen Pals
The chance to make a new friend with someone on the outside can be an excellent opportunity for people in prison. There are several organizations that set inmates up with pen-pals, but in most cases the inmates are not able to register themselves for this service. But people outside of prison can register an inmate and include a bio and picture.
Here’s the list of pen-pal groups:
Posted by hcdmedia
Fathering Behind Bars
Being a father behind bars is challenging. Its often hard to stay in contact, let alone form a close relationship. One dad in prison has written up a list of tips for other fathers. Here are the first 5 tips:
- Even if your relationship with the mother of your children is over, you need to establish and maintain a positive relationship with her. For the sake of your children try to find ways to connect with her respectfully.
- Don’t expect big changes right away from your family members. Take your time.
- Find out about policies regarding how you can connect with your child-visitation, letters, telephone calls, audio tapes, etc. Ask your prison chaplain, counselor or other staff.
- Develop a plan and follow it on how often you will connect with your child.
- When explaining to your children why you are not living with them, be honest but respect their ability to understand it according to their age.
Check out the full list here.
And check out the Families and Corrections Network – an organization that focuses on the needs and concerns of families of prisoners: http://www.fcnetwork.org
Posted by hcdmedia
Forgiveness
It is hard to imagine ever recovering from the trauma of having a loved one murdered. Some family members choose to heal their grief while calling for an end to capital punishment and retaliation.
Ryan Nixon lost his sister to a murder. Now he along with other family members of murder victims speak out against the death penalty. Ryan says:
My sister’s passing was tragic; it broke the hearts, and almost the bonds, of my family. I saw the hardest of men break down in tears. But, as there is always a silver lining to every cloud, instead of giving into the hatred in my heart, I opened it to allow forgiveness, love, and compassion to prevail.”
Murder Victims’ Families for Reconciliation is an organization of families of murder victims who are committed to reconciliation and ending capital punishment. To learn more visit the MVFR website.
Posted by hcdmedia
Impact of Incarceration on Kids
It is widely reported that children with parents who’ve been to prison are much more likely to be incarcerated themselves. For this reason, it can be a good idea to seek out intervention and prevention services. There are programs around the country that offer mentoring programs for at-risk youth. An organization based in Memphis, called Families of Incarcerated Individuals states that mentoring can:
• Improve a child’s self esteem
• Help improve academic skills
• Lead young people to resources they may not find on their own
• Provide support for new behaviors, attitudes and ambitions
• Enhance parenting
There’s another group in California that provides children and youth who’ve been impacted by incarceration with tools to interrupt the cycle of incarceration and violence. It’s called Project What! and it uses the arts to build self-esteem and help kids to find their personal voice. Click here to check out the project’s website.
Also, check out this video about Project What! 
Posted by hcdmedia
Grandparents Raising Kids
There is an organization based in the Bronx that offers support and resources to grandparents who are raising the children of their children due to incarceration or other circumstances. It’s called GAP (Grandparents Advocacy Project) and the mission is described on the website:
To relieve the responsibilities of grandparents who through no fault of their own, must be the primary caregivers of their grandchildren. To accomplish this, the Grandparents Advocacy Project, Inc. offers support through advocacy, education, counseling, referral, health/fitness and social respite.”
To learn more, visit the Grandparents Advocacy Project online.
Posted by hcdmedia
Single Parents
One in ten kids in America have a parent under the supervision of the criminal justice system. That means there are a lot of single parents out there doing their best to minimize the family disruption that’s caused by incarceration.
The Child Welfare League of America is the oldest national organization devoted to the well-being of America’s vulnerable children. They have a wide variety of services in all 50 states, and can be contacted at (703) 412-2400. Their mission is help children grow up in a safe, loving, and stable environment no matter what else is going on in their family’s life – so don’t hesitate to reach out. Here’s their website: http://www.cwla.org
Another program called Rainbows offers emotional support to children who are missing one or more of their parents. Visit the Rainbows website for a description of their programs, and a list of states where they are offered.
Rainbows is also mentioned in an article on ImperfectParent.com called “Parenting Outside the Razor Wire”. The article brings up the importance for the single parent to find emotional support for themselves as well in order to better care of their kids.
Posted by hcdmedia
Helpful tips
Being in relationship with someone who’s incarcerated is a daily challenge. It can be difficult to stay positive and hopeful while having to cope with the realities with life on your own. The following list offers suggestions of ways to stay connected to your loved one while taking good care of yourself. (more…)
Posted by hcdmedia
Poem about Visiting a Prisoner
Visiting a family member in prison can be a difficult and emotionally trying experience. Many find that expressing these feeling through poetry can be therapeutic. Here is a poem written by an inmate in response to a visit from his mother.
The Window ©William J. Ray
There you are
On the other side of the window
You look sad and scared
Wondering where your son is about to go
You tell me you miss me
And that you want me home
Then you smile and tell me how much my little brother has grown
We catch up on lost times
As fast as we can
Because we both know
We’ll probably never see each other again
You start crying
And I can see
That deep inside you’re dying
You’re blaming yourself
For not being the best mom
And I tell you
It was my choice to do wrong
It hurts me to see you blaming yourself
Because I know that deep inside
You wish you could help
Because you already have one son gone
And you’re about to loose another one
The only thing you want right now
Are your two oldest children
Back with their little brother
And home with their loving mother
It’s about time for you to go
We sit in silence
Wishing that we were on the same side of the window
That we could hug for one last time
Before I get sent away for my crime
You put your hand to the glass
And I start crying
I’ve hurt so many people and this is the last
Because it’s not worth watching my whole life go
Behind the window
Click here to view this poem online.
Posted by hcdmedia